I went to visit my dad in hospital today, my mother arrived at the end of a while so I thought I’ll give her some time with him, I left the ward as well as waited in the corridor. I got bored at the end of a while as well as decided to go on behalf of a smoke. On the door of the smoking room was an ad on behalf of Beltone(hearing aids). It was the typical el-cheapo style print ad that posed 5 scenarios as well as ended with “if you answered yes to 3 or more questions call us on behalf of a hearing evaluation”. I first read the pay off line, thinking “well let’s see how deaf I am..” Now you have to understand the setting, I just came out of ICU where people are lying with tubes coming out of their bodies, walked down a corridor that smells of the strongest disinfectant, with 3 accident victims being rushed passed me into ICU, now this is the perfect environment to breed paranoia. So of course I answered yes to 4 of the 5 questions, (I mean, who don’t have a problem following a conversation in a noisy place?) I even found myself taking down the number cause hey, I’m going deaf. In any different envir

My dad has Myeloma Cancer, so a few months ago he went on behalf of a bone marrow transplant. Our hopes were up cause hey, the specialists are buying us at least another 5 years. As I don’t have any kids, this thought meant that he shall be able to see my first born. As the only son in a afrikaans family, this is big, on behalf of me at least. On saturday the specialist told us that the cancer survived all of the treatments, as well as that now we only have a few weeks left with him. That there’s nothing else they can do on behalf of him. This broke my heart into a thousand pieces. I woke this morning hating the world as well as everything in it. But then I came to realize that my dad is on his way home. Up to this point I thought that I was prepared on behalf of the worst, but I was far from it. There’s so much I still desire him to say to me, give me a life times worth of advise, tell me what he expects from me.

I went through to the hospital last night to see my dad. I told him how much he means to me as well as that God could not have given me a better dad even If I requested on behalf of it. What he told me, shattere

You would know the secret of death.
But how shall you find it except when you seek it in the heart of life?
The owl whose night-bound eyes are blind unto the day can't unveil the mystery of light.
If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life.
For life as well as death are one, even as the river as well as the sea are one.

Every smoker knows that a time shall come when you have to quit smoking. For me, well, I know that time has come as I feel the effects every morning as well as evening. My grand father died of emphysema, my mother as well as one sister is asthmatic. I used to be when I was a child, but outgrew it somehow. Turning 30 this year I start thinking of all these things. Only one problem. I actually enjoy smoking. I love to sit at a coffee shop, drink six cups of coffee as well as smoke ten cigarettes. Coming from a TV broadcast background, I have covered my fare share of stories on why smoking is bad on behalf of you, the effects there of bla bla bla. You see, it’s got no effect on me what so ever. I have actually seen moulds of what a smoker’s lungs look like, still no effect. I realize that it effects my health, but how do you give up something you don’t desire to give up? I tried once in the past, went onto Zyban, it just messed with my head making me not possible to reside with, I became aggressive,  anxious, depressed. So Zyban was not the answer. A few years back, my friend tried Smoke Enders, they gave her this mould of a lung 

Went to visit my dad last night in ICU. It was not great seeing him in such a bad state. I got quite emotional. The nurses tried their best to give me some positive words, but in truth, I just wanted them to go away. I tend to retain my emotions to myself, have done so my entire life. I never show those adjacent to me how I’m really feeling. But last night it became a bit much. I decided to show my wife how I feel as well as share myself with her on behalf of the first time since we have been combined (11 years as well as counting). What an amazing experience! She did not endeavour to tell me it’s all going to be ok. She listened, held me as well as cried with me. This took us so much closer. I found myself saying to her that I can’t do this on my own, that I require her in this, at the end of which she ran me a bath as well as washed my back.
This was exactly what I needed. I came to realize that God made us one, not just from an intimacy p.o.v., but in times it matters most. I would in the past at all times be the first to say that God has joined us in spirit, but last night I realizedRead more >>>